A cure for boredom maybe around the corner. Here it is... a train.

Those who can teach, anyone seen that advert? Anyone throwing a brick at the telly when that advert came in?

Christine Gilbert, the chief inspector of schools, has got it in for boring teachers. She's announced a "crackdown" on them. Not incompetent teachers or corrupt teachers. Not drunken teachers, teachers who put a video on for most lessons or teachers who they say once touched Benson on the bottom. No, she is cracking down on the ones who fail to convince the random bunch of kids in front of them that physics isn't just some dry and counterintuitive rules, but a veritable party in their brains.

Well, if my experience of school is anything to go by, she may have to root out half the profession. School is mostly boring and the lessons are the most boring bit. Some teachers are born boring, some achieve boringness, some have boringness thrust upon them by the national curriculum. And although most of them aren't dull people, and may be fascinating in private, plenty still give boring lessons.

And how is Christine Gilbert planning to find out who the dreariest educators are? She certainly mustn't take the pupils' word for it - that would be putting the lunatics in charge of the asylum. Perhaps she'll ask the boring teachers to own up? But the most mind-numbing people are usually completely unaware of it and often consider themselves quite the life and soul, in contrast to everyone they meet who, they seem to find, either slinks away, nods off or begins quietly to weep.

I'd certainly hate it if this crackdown ended up benefiting the kind of smug, preening, self-styled 'popular' teacher, who encourages pupils to use his first name and talks about "how inspiring the kids are" in order to get off with people at parties. You know the type: disingenuous, needy and often, in extremis, suddenly cruel. Give me a mouldy-armpitted nerd with halitosis and a voice like distant drilling any day of the week.

But I imagine the plan is even more hopeless than that - they're going to try and make boring lessons more interesting. Any scheme to do this at a national level is likely to be as effective as attempting to thread 20,000 needles by chucking the cotton at them from 100 yards away. It ignores the fact that some of the things that children really ought to learn are boring. Information is not interesting in direct proportion to how important it is. But are teachers to be penalised for that? Are we going to phase out maths in favour of more media studies and dance?

This study is a result from talking at the morons who are people who boast that they "get bored very easily". They're implying that their minds are too active and creative to be tied down for long by one task, career or even group of friends. Most things, they're suggesting, are beneath their contempt. But getting bored easily is the mark of the moron, the person who can stick at nothing and anything really worthwhile, anyone but a superhuman has to stick at. School is where this wearying truth must make itself known.

Fortunately, this crackdown will come to nothing. It's just a soundbite that will make teachers even glummer and give affirmation to children who don't pay attention. They'd better enjoy it while it lasts.